Today is Kaz’s birthday. Today I will pause to pay “roast style” homage to my one and only Red-Headed Russian friend…

I met Kaz my sophomore year of college late one night when he was roaming the halls looking for a computer where he could type a paper. I offered, he declined. Thus began an incredibly disapointing friendship on both ends. A year later I met Kaz once again in Wiley Hall where I was an RA and Kaz was a frequent Dare-Taker-Uper. One of these nights Kaz drank around 10 ounces of Ketchup, other times utterly inhuman amounts of syrup as well as milk. Thus marked the incredibly entertaining era of our friendship. In less disgusting memories, Kaz and I took up eating Santana’s Burriots, and often.

Kaz is what we would call a “big” fan of the show Family Guy and makes it a point to speak in the villainous accent of baby Stewie 3 hours of every day. Taken in small doses this can be amusing at best.

Once upon a time my cousin Jeff Ours got married and became the worst fantasy football player of all time. As league commish I ousted the dead weight and placed Kaz in his place. Kaz won the championship that year, he currently is in first place and as usual this accounts for almost all of my hatred towards my close friend Kaz, who is also a Chargers fan, the Chargers being the team that recently beat my beloved Broncos. Again, Kaz constantly aligns himself with the object of my intense loathing.

Kaz, for all his “on the field” ferocity and general “being a dominating jerk” is relatively mellow “off the field.” You won’t catch this kid listening to the latest rock albums. He likes to relax to the soothing sounds of Enya, nothing harder. Harder “rock” music is evil and of no use to Kaz as it serves only to rot the soul and turn us into delinquients.

An avid theologian (reader and practicer) Kaz has been influenced by the likes of such wusses as Stanley Hauerwas and John Howard Yoder. In January Kaz will come visit me as we both listen to Stanley and friends talk at NTS.